8.14.2009

synchronicity

Everything happens in threes. At least, I notice that funerals happen in threes.

So I get back from Houston on Tuesday. Last night, someone that used to hang with the pack I ran with about a year ago shot himself. I heard this morning. The funeral will be sometime next week.

So now I'm nervous. Day before yesterday, I had a horrible panic attack. Is that a synchronicity? It makes me wonder, because a lot of things have fallen to the Jungian idea of 'synchronicity', and I'm not sure if I'm really in the mix with that. I mean, I want to be in tune with things, but I really hate the passing feelings and being unable to account for them. It means that I can't intervene. And maybe I'm not supposed to, but then why get the feelings at all?

I'm so confused.

8.07.2009

slowing down

When was the last time you slowed down to evaluate your life?

I'm heading to Houston for a funeral which is on Monday. The woman was a part of my family, but that is not saying that I knew her well. I know that she was strong in her church and community, and that every interaction I ever had with her, she was very sweet and very kind. She made sure that my children got presents for their birthdays and Christmas, and tried to make sure and call us every so often.

A lot of times we get so caught up in all the things we have to do, we have a hard time slowing down to evaluate that in which we have. The long and short of it is that we have a very askew sense of value - people who are too wound up in their work often miss out on their family life. People who are all about the family never have adventures or dreams beyond the gates of their fences.

So what is it then? It is making sure that we strike a balance. That we can appreciate what we have, yet drink of something more. We cannot let that which eludes us embitter us. Or make us hopeless. Yet we cannot keep snapping at the heels of it either.

And then I hear my buddy whisper at me from the darkness. He says, "Everything in moderation. Even moderation."

Some days it's easier to listen than others.