11.03.2008

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I think I'm being tested at work.

Well, what's the saying? "Seen in it's true light, everything is a test."

Yeah, buddy.

I figured as much, being that I'm the noob and I really don't know a damn thing about some of the things that I have to do. I just keep hearing the mentor from the leadership program, "If it CAN be delegated, it WILL be delegated." I think I have to make this my personal mantra.

I don't think that the switch is so difficult to me, but I do like to LOOK busy, and frankly, no one respects a leader who won't do themselves what they delegate you to do, right? Or am I fishing here?

I have to wear dress clothes and my feet have been killing me. At one point, the boss even inquired as to what kind of shoes that I would be wearing. I think he was hinting about it. I couldn't find any of my utilitarian shoes (even in dress shoes, I buy flats or things which I can run in...), only a pair of dressy, classic black flats and I think I'm blistered. After day 2 like that, I bought some casual suede guy shoes.

Yes, I wear guy shoes. Chick shoes are REALLY unrealistic. Who the hell wants to run around on tiptoe all day? Give me Docs over Mary Janes any day.

And I don't get the double standard, just to digress. Men wore make-up in Egypt. Men carried purses in England. They wore velvet and lace and heels.

And today? Hell, they get beat up for it, or worse. Much worse. I've no respect for five self-guessing homophobes where it takes FIVE of them (did I mention five?) or so to beat up some scrawny young man who is wrestling to learn, understand, and accept himself for who he is. But anyone who would do such a thing has a streak of violence and cruelty, and any that have tried to worm their way into my circles have been dropped in a hot minute.

And it doesn't stop at just the guys, I assure you.

Regardless....I think today was just a day to rant. I hurt, I'm under fire.

What was that Noobler Elf? Yeah...your hero's quote.

"Nobody is in control. Not the government. Not the Pope. Nobody." - Terrence McKenna

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