it started with me writing, "I'm not gay."

If you look to the right (the writing on the Wall), there's a blog from that other place. The idea was that I'm not gay, but really, if I have to go out to a bar, going to a gay bar is preferred to going to any bar at all. The reasoning behind it is that, quite frankly, that crowd is WAY more acceptable and tolerant than any other group that isn't neo-pagan. Aside from the snickering at the catty remarks made by some of the guys that I hung with, it just has a better atmosphere all around. Especially out here in Podunk, where the bars are relatively smaller and much fewer, so everyone generally knows everyone and they take care of their own, so to speak.

Anyway, a young follower of the blog made a dumb comment about his butt to the effect he didn't want someone thinking about 'ramming his tubesteak' there. But he has gay friends.

You can imagine the hostility he is going to face. He already got one face full from a friend.

But a lot of things occur to me.

This guy, who made the initial crass remark, is very young. Only about four years out of high school. That really isn't a lot of time exposed to the real world, and although his words are badly chosen, here is an opportunity to educate him.

The person responding is a nice person, a gay man. His response is heated and impassioned about what he feels. But I think his method is not the best, because objectively, it looks like a gay man ranting at a homophobic straight guy.

So nothing to get resolved.

My commentary goes along the lines of their replies. And where I don't agree with either of their responses to one another (or my blog for that matter), I don't hold it against either of them. One is fighting fear, the other is fighting stereotype. I just hate seeing it disintegrate into something ugly.

Like I said in the blog, we're all on this mudball together. We all should try very hard to get along, because as it is, all we have is each other.


mrsb said...

As someone who gets all worked up at the ignorant use of the word "retard", I get where the young man was coming from. It's easy to get ranty when you are passionate about something and someone makes off handed remarks that they think are "funny".

I've found that often when someone blames crass humor, it's because they know that they said something that would offend others, and they're just making an excuse.

knottybynature said...

I totally agree. I thought he was out of place, but by then, the damage was done so I let it play out. *sigh*

Freedom of speech is one thing. But I don't under stand why some people go out of their way to be blatantly offensive.