madly (otherwise, Change)

I might as well be moving. :)

Change is inevitable, and most of the time, you're not really prepared for it. It never occurs to me in steps, just large dollops that take over my own personal universe like the Blob. Sometimes it's wonderful, other times it's horrible, but any time I think it's good...because it means that I am not static, and that there is growth and life continues on.

Sometimes it's not entirely the change that's mine though, but it doesn't mean that I am no less effected.

For instance....both beautiful and horrific? The act of child birth. It's tension-filled, the time seems to slow, and the spirit can be beat up in the brutality of conflicting emotions that go along with a new child coming into the world. There can be tensions about who is there during birth, friction between families, and all of that is nothing compared to what the new parents go through.

I got to catch it on film.

I've been two two births since my own, where I was actually in the room during birth. The first one is not so clear as this last one (last week), but then again, I got to catch it with the 'sport' setting on camera. Each still frame could be matched together to make a 'action flip book' for the mother if she wanted. The craziness is the brilliance of shade, of color, and lighting that the camera captured. The colors of the majority of the pictures were the colors of the real life experience. And perhaps not every photo op was taken, but it won't let me forget the color of the placenta chillin' in a large, flat metal dish which is disturbingly akin to the ones they use over warmed water in cafeterias.

But change can effect us without directly moving towards us, or directly impacting us. But it does impact.

I have a tendency to teach when I explain things. Not because I just really think I am a teacher, but because I have a necessity to be understood, so I take my time, elaborate on the points that I am trying to make, and ask often if I am understood, which can sometimes lead to lengthy discourse. I caught myself a few weeks ago, explaining the changes that I watched through audio media...from six tracks, to eight tracks, to vinyl, to cassettes, to cds, and now the mp3s.....and how computers evolved. From the stories I heard from my friends that worked with NASA and the endless 'card' programs, through four shades of monochrome, to VGA and beyond. It is surprises me that none of the younger people get to hear this, that they are not taught the leaps and bounds in technology we have made in the last 30 years. It's an amazing change....magic, in its own right.

Change can be frightening. Sometimes the gods ask of us to leap, unseeing, into the void to prove our love and devotion. It's a test of mettle, and I would not say it is something that happens often, but it does happen.

When it does, will you jump?