September is over, which brings forth cooler tidings and seasonal changes. It's weird how I feel like it's been forever since I've been cold (the mornings here in Houston have been cool), but how it feels my sister and stepbrother disappeared not too long ago.
I thought that this month would be easier, being that my sister's birthday was last month, but it's not. Not really. I'll be 35 this month, and after April, I will have exceeded my sister's lifespan. It's kind of a depressing thought, so frankly, I'm not really looking forward to my birthday. I find it just easier to take it a day at time.
I have, however, decided in all these things, over the past few months, that I wanted to embrace my spirituality more fully. A part of that came along in the decision to open the shop. The decision stills scares the hell out of me, but it has always been something I've wanted to do. And frankly, life's to short to wait around dreaming of things instead of doing them.
I find myself among old friends again. Moving forward through life is fine, but if you are moving just to move, you much resemble the card the Fool, with common sense nipping at your heels. It's great to have new experiences and make new friends, but we are creatures of limited space and time, and we should not let our past be forgotten. I think that some people would say that circling back is some sort of pattern that needs to be broken. I don't see it that way. If we weren't meant to have cycles, there would be none. And just because I have certain cycles, doesn't mean that others don't have different types of cycles. The idea though is to spiral upwards, not just chase your tail. As for my old friends....well, time and hardships can change a person, do they not? But the hope is that whatever was fundamental about them that brought you closer to them doesn't change. That is, anyway, the hope.
The death season is upon us, and with death comes new beginnings. I hope that they are the best to come.